A slightly naughty sonnet written before the Amorphophallus titanum bloomed–I checked in on the live webcam, which was especially fun to see after hours. . .



People keep checking in. A quarter
of a million, and counting. Amorpho-
phallus titanum: the “largest known un-
branched inflorescence in the plant kingdom”
–the largest phallus. Here comes a guy with
a hose. He’s wearing shorts, and he stands erect,
gazing, before going on to the palms.
A guard strolls by with his water bottle,
and here comes another guy with a hose.
More swollen than it was last night, will it
burst wildly or slowly unfold its stinking horn?
No pollinating beetles are summoned here
by the scent. Give a hand to this mighty bloom–
so prodigal of water, energy, rank perfume.

MP July 18, 2013



  1. Judith says:

    This made me laugh out loud-/ well done!

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